Ernestine Mary Cooley

It is with grieving hearts that our family announces the passing of our beloved mother, Ernestine Mary McCrossin Cooley, on July 16, 2026, at the age of 91.  After suffering a stroke nearly 3 ½ years ago, Mom came to live in Columbia with Cindy and her husband Jim, due to the 24 hour care she needed, which they lovingly provided without complaint.  She passed peacefully at their home, surrounded by family.

She was born on November 20, 1934, to Ernest (a proud Canadian Irish man) and Roseva Loring McCrossin, in Saint Leonard, New Brunswick, Canada, a small French town just across the border from northern Maine.  While still in elementary school, Mom’s family emigrated across the border to Van Buren, Maine, because her father had obtained employment at the nearby Air Force base.  Although English was spoken in the home, Mom and her siblings grew up also speaking French, the predominate language of both St. Leonard and Van Buren.

Ernestine attended an all-girls Catholic school, taught by French nuns (who Mom says scared all the girls to death with stories of the end days), graduating from Sacred Heart High School in 1953.  She then began work at Rexall Drugs, and Charette’s Jewelry in downtown Van Buren.

Various versions exist about how Mom met Dad, but most suggest that they met at a dance in Van Buren.  However, Mom refused to dance with him, because he was a soldier at Loring Air Force Base, and good girls didn’t associate with boys from the base.  And… he wasn’t Catholic.  But Dad persevered, became a devout Catholic, and John Howard Cooley married Ernestine Mary McCrossin on April 19, 1956, at Saint Bruno’s Catholic Church in Van Buren.  They enjoyed 40 years of marriage until Dad’s sudden passing on January 4, 1997.

Ernestine was, above all, a devout Catholic.  She raised her children in the faith, including cleaning and dressing up many cranky children for early Sunday morning Mass, and often coercing the same cranky children to kneel for evening Rosaries.  Divine Mercy Chaplets, Rosaries, and spiritual readings were daily devotions.  She did weekly Adoration.  Most of all, she really lived her Christian values, showing her children unconditional love, and teaching them the value of giving from the heart.  Not just to family members, but to anyone in the community in need,such as the young, struggling cashier at the Dollar General who Mom taught to drive and how to budget.

Ernestine was an active member of the Ladies Auxiliary of the Knights of Columbus and a member of The Daughters of Isabella.  She volunteered at the Hospice Clothing Store of Jefferson City, the Samaritan Center, and cleaning the church among many other things.  Mom dearly loved her three godchildren, who all returned that love: Rudy Parent of Hamlin, Maine; Michael John O’Rourke of Jefferson City; and Beth (Bernskoetter) Plank, also of Jefferson City.

Second only to her faith, Ernestine was an artist, always finding or creating beauty.  Despite having little to work with, Mom decorated our home like a designer, making Christmases and Easters even more special.  She was an excellent seamstress, sewing many of her own fashionable clothes and those of her daughters as well.  As they grew older, she sewed beautiful clothes for their dolls and Barbies, as well as homecoming and prom gowns.

Birthday cakes were works of art.  She loved art galleries, especially paintings and glass/crystal works.  In nature, Mom found artistic wonder in everything, even that which might be missed by any other eye, usually commenting that only God could create something so perfect.  At one time, she painted, but her efforts were usually thwarted by any number of fussy children.

Our Mom’s early life with our Dad was an adventure.  Shortly after marrying, Dad first took Mom to visit at his family farm in Kansas, almost 2,000 miles away, while his family worried what kind of girl he was bringing home after such a short courtship.  But his sister, our Aunt Jane, summed it up, telling us, “The minute we all met your mother, all we could think was… she is such a lady!”  Mom’s natural elegance and graciousness charmed everyone she met throughout her life.  And to Midwesterners, the fact that she spoke French added an even greater element of refinement.

However, Kansas did not always charm our Mother.  She told us that the drought-stricken landscape, the oppressive heat such as she had never known, and the tornados that terrified her caused her to pack her bags many limes and threaten to move home.  But she was devoted to Dad and stayed, learning to cook like a Midwesterner from his Mom, our dear Grandma Cooley.  And a fantastic cook she turned out to be!

Mom’s next adventure was moving to Manhattan, Kansas so that Dad could finish college.  She loved the college town atmosphere, the football and basketball games, and campus celebrations.  Next came Kansas City, while Dad sought employment.  Despite having been raised in a small town, and being somewhat timid, Mom came to appreciate big city life, with the help of two elderly ladies who lived next door, who loved their charming neighbor, and introduced her to downtown Kansas City, big department stores, and Velvet Freeze ice cream.  A lifelong special friendship remained between them, and included us children.

Ernestine’s final move took her to Jefferson City, Missouri, a fairly small, closeknit community of German Catholics.  Mom was blessed to be “adopted” there by amazing neighbors who welcomed her into their community, helping her learn more Midwestern culture, gardening, canning and preserving, and becoming lifelong special friends: Millie Bernskoetter, Doris O’Rourke, and Lucille Schmitz, among others.

But Mom was not finished.  After years as a homemaker and after her children were grown, she decided to seek some kind of employment so that she could have her own spending money to use as she pleased.  Dad was, of course, worried because of how it might reflect on him, as in that era none of his friends or coworkers had wives who worked outside the home.  Despite his hesitance, Mom began working in the nursery at KinderCare with infants and one year olds.  Because of her love for children, she quickly became one of the favorite caregivers, and many of the parents maintained life-long relationships with her.  In April of 1985, she received recognition as the Outstanding Caregiver in the entire St. Louis/Central Missouri KinderCare district, called the Above and Beyond award.  Naturally, she also made lifelong friends with her coworkers.  And… she still managed to have supper on the table every evening, including a homemade dessert (which she had always done, spoiling us all for years).  No wonder none of us can ever eat any sweets that are not homemade from scratch!

Mom also continued to show adventurous, fearless (reckless?) strength after dad’s passing, a few of which were driving by herself in a snowstorm in the night to Columbia or Slater because one of her children needed her, or accompanying our youngest sister in the middle of the night as our sister searched for items that had been stolen from her by a duplicitous boyfriend, or mom ever so slightly over-imbibing one evening at a hotel on the last night of what had been a long, arduous trip to Maine and back (remember, she was mostly a teetotaler), or mom driving our brother’s big truck to help him (she seemed pretty proud of herself), and helping him with the unladylike task of hauling a harvested deer out of the field, and dressing and processing it as well.  We all saw many other different sides of Mom that surprised us.  And the moral of this?  There was absolutely nothing our mother wouldn’t do for her children.

Mom also began travelling extensively with family or friends, including cross-country trips to visit relatives, and enjoyed attending Mass at Cathedrals and Basilicas along the way.  She traveled abroad, trips to Ireland (her all-time favorite), pilgrimages to Medjugorje and to Rome, as well as visits to many European countries.  She especially enjoyed art museums, European architecture (especially Cathedrals), and continental fashion.

Ernestine was pre-deceased by her mother and father, our Dad, our sister Mary Renee Cooley Koelling, and all of her siblings: Joe McCrossin, (Lorraine), Bob McCrossin (Dot), Isabel Parent (Gerard), Mary Dumond Malenfant (Stacy, Leon), Rita McCrossin, and infant Lorne McCrossin.

Ernestine is survived by her children: John Mark Cooley, Cindy Franke (Jim), both of Columbia, Missouri; Patty Doherty (Tom) of Blue Springs, Missouri; Deanna Maddox (Homer) of Holts Summit, Missouri; Chris Cooley (Sonya) of Jefferson City, Missouri; and William Cooley (Jennifer), of Bonnet’s Mill, Missouri.  She is also survived by her grandchildren: Robert Renick Jr. (Rhonda), Angel Jacquin (Kenneth), Michael Renick (Mallory), Colter Doherty (Diana), Emily Franke, Hannah Thompson (Steven), Danielle Miloro (Joe), Caleb Propst (Renee), Victoria Cooley, Nicholas Cooley (Sarah), Catherine Kernen (Kelly), Rosemary Koelling, and Cindy and Jim’s adoptive granddaughter, Soriya Leon, who loved our mother like her own grandmother.  Ernestine also leaves behind 23 great grandchildren.

To honor Ernestine’s life, a Visitation will be held on Saturday, July 25, 2026, at 9:30 a.m. followed by a Mass of Christian Burial at 11:00 a.m. at Immaculate Conception Catholic Church 1206 E McCarty St. Jefferson City 65101 with the Rev. Msgr. Robert A. Kurwicki officiating.  Burial will be in Resurrection Catholic Cemetery.

Donations in her memory are encouraged to Immaculate Conception Catholic Church or the Samaritan Center.

Services entrusted to Trimble Funeral Homes – Jefferson City.    trimblefunerals.com

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